What's the Message - Nov 29, 2021.
I don't like to generalize, but from my experience I believe that everyone has some sort of core wound that they carry with them. It could be from a traumatic event, words that were spoken (or not) to you from a person you are close to, or a paradigm you lived under for many years, to name a few sources. Whatever the source, the end result is the same. That core wound or wounds shapes the way we view ourselves and the world around us. In essence, we craft a message sourced from the wounding and apply it to our lives. The longer that wound goes unaddressed, the stronger and louder the message becomes, and the harder it is to see as a lie. This can have a devastating effect on our self image and personal relationships.
For 35 years I lived without realizing I had a core wound, much less realizing how important it was for me to deal with it. When I was at a particularly low point in my life, one of my best friends saw my agony and asked me to trust him in order to begin the healing process. That trust led me to a men's group that helped me to realize that this wound I suffered more than 25 years prior had resulted in a message that I told myself regularly whenever I would mess up or things wouldn't go the way I planned them. The messages were "you're not good enough", "you're not worth it", "you're a failure", and "you're a fake". I had played that message for so long, when I got married and had kids, I added "you're a terrible dad" and "you're a terrible husband" to the mix. Unfortunately, I didn't have many people other than my wife speaking truth into my life on a regular basis because I had gotten very good at masking the lies I was believing. As such, no one other than my wife saw how depressed I had become. The men in the men's group exposed the message as a lie and, more importantly, what the source was. Once I got the courage to address that core wound, the healing process began.
The suture from the wound is still there and serves as a reminder that I need to be careful what message I listen to in the midst of challenges. The true messages for all of us are, "you ARE good enough", "you have EVERYTHING you need to be successful", and "you ARE worth it". Playing those messages over and over again in our heads will have an incredibly positive impact on our lives.
What message or messages are you believing? How can you know if the messages are truth or lies? What is the source of the messages? What is one way you can begin to unwind the false messages you have told yourself?